The Greatest Lover of Last Tuesday

By (author): Neil McKinnon

In this comical novel about sexuality, relationships, and aging, self-proclaimed World’s Greatest Lover, eighty-year-old Alberto Camelo frankly recounts his exhaustion at being tasked with a lover whose spontaneous ecstasy becomes too much for him to handle, his short-lived stint in the army, and how he ran a franchise of “specialty” restaurants – into the ground, that is. An aura of absurdity pervades this humorous satire of a life characterized by awkward amorous encounters, lascivious liaisons, and erotic irreverence.


Neil McKinnon

Neil McKinnon was raised in Saskatchewan and served in the Royal Canadian Navy before working as a businessman, archaeologist, university lecturer, and freelance writer in China, Japan, Mexico, Canada, and the United States. His articles have appeared in Canadian, Japanese, Mexican and U.S. publications, and his book Tuckahoe Slidebottle was short-listed for the Stephen Leacock Award for humour and for the Alberta Book Award for short fiction. He has served on literary juries and has also edited and published academically. He is a pensioner and long distance runner. When not visiting family in Vancouver, McKinnon and his wife of fifty years, Judy, live in Mexico.


“It’s impossible not to adore these characters and envy the author’s talent. This book’s difficult to put down, easy to recommend. You will laugh out loud.” – Shelley Leedahl in Saskatchewan Publishers Group Weekly

“It is McKinnon’s use of language which makes the novel such an enjoyable read. Students will see the possibilities of language come alive in this book. Highly recommended” -J. Lynn Fraser in CM Magazine

“All (the stories) are told with the wry sense of humor and the deft turn of phrase of which Mr. McKinnon is master.” – Mildred Boyd in Lake Chapala Review

“McKinnon’s writing sparkles with wit and his descriptions are so vivid they’ll make you feel as if you’ve visited this place. The twists in the narrative will bring a smile to your face, and occasionally a lump in your throat. I would recommend this book to anyone who enjoys the combination of a good yarn blended with brilliant literary skill.” – Alison Solomon in El Ojo del Lago


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Excerpts & Samples ×
Now that you, the reader, have been forewarned that mine is a character not without defects, and now that I have achieved the dubious status of octogenarian, I, Alberto Camelo, have decided to continue unloading my memory in order to let the world know how it was that I overcame my flaws to become the greatest lover of this or any other century.

I did not take this decision lightly knowing full well that there are many who will dispute my claim. Being entirely aware of the storm that my declaration was bound to precipitate, I waited until I was eighty recognizing that, if the heat of the uproar became too great, my advanced age coupled with an active libido would ensure that I was soon cooling my ardour in a hotter place. I also considered the decision carefully because, as the saying goes, there is no fool like an old fool.

When I told my neighbour, Adriana, of my intent she cackled like an ancient whore and said, “You forget, old man, that I have known you for the better part of our two lives and that we once feasted together on Passion Mountain. If my memory is not riding a lame horse the feast turned out to be a snack with damp crackers and stale cheese. Perhaps you are the greatest lover of last Tuesday.”

I chose to ignore this unkind remark attributing it to the emotion of jealousy which Adriana had surely experienced in large quantity long ago when I opted to bestow my affection on another who had exhibited a more delicate and less brassy nature.

Throughout these pages, the reader will observe that Adriana is more than happy to speak at length concerning the deficiencies she sees in both my appearance and my temperament. I do not deny any of these imperfections although they caused my pursuit of love to be a complex undertaking, similar to completing a doctorate without a research grant. Generally, I avoided the issue of my looks and personality by not requiring my partners to have the type of beauty that my male colleagues seem to think is necessary to achieve an orgasmic experience. Most of them spend their time chasing women instead of pursuing love which is a little like eating the corn flakes box for breakfast.

Reader Reviews



240 Pages
8.5in * 5.5in * .6in


March 31, 2015


Thistledown Press



Book Subjects:

FICTION / Humorous / General

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