“Blurring the Lines Between Fiction and Reality”: An Interview with Jowita Bydlowska

All Lit Up: Monster is described as autofiction, and explores themes of female rage, motherhood, and identity. How did you approach blending deeply personal experiences with broader societal critiques? How did you navigate the line between fiction and autobiography?

Jowita Bydlowska: I didn’t intend for Monster to be autofiction, but I thought it would be an interesting experiment to give the protagonist my name and see if that will result in writing something more personal and emotional. I was going to change the name to something else once I was done. What ended up happening is that because I was writing about “Jowita,” many of the emotions she was having were very close to my own and so were many of her experiences—so things like being a first-generation immigrant, being a parent, being an author, etc. Unlike with a memoir, I didn’t need to stick to the truth and I could exaggerate many of those experiences to the point where they’d become totally fictionalized and no longer my own. I was also interested in writing something that would make me come “full circle,” as a writer—I started my career by publishing a memoir and my first novel was from the point of view of a man, followed by a novel describing a romantic experience I once had as a 30-something-year-old woman. As for societal critiques, I guess I’m always interested in women’s experiences in the world that I like to illuminate through the lens of interpersonal relationships.

ALU: Can you tell us about the choice to write your novel in second person?

JB: I wrote Monster in second-person addressed to the nameless “you,” who is actually my protagonist’s lover so the book is sort of a love letter (and later on, in the book, I break the fourth wall a bit and tell this “you” that I will publish what I’ve written if he agrees to it). I almost always write in the present tense. The reason I do that and the reason I chose second-person POV is because that makes the story more immediate and more intimate, almost like hearing a confession from someone who accosts you at a party (it’s not quite like a diary because it happens as you read, in the present). And for me, as an artist, I was just curious to explore a different POV—I’ve done first-person as me (in my memoir), first-person as Guy [from Guy], etc., and now this. My next novel is written in third- and first-person. (The thing that remains constant is present-tense, which is just a stylistic choice).

ALU: The relationships in the book are intricate and multi-dimensional. Which were the most challenging to write, and why? Did you find yourself investing more in certain characters as you were writing?

JB: The more challenging romantic relationship was the one with the lover because I had to try very hard to make him likeable and to make the reader understand how he would be a catalyst for a change. In the beginning, he was quite a cad and definitely not the romantic hero I made him out to be in later versions. When I showed my manuscript to my agent, she pointed out that I wrote almost the same character as I did in Possessed, my second novel, where the protagonist does fall for a cad. So I had to rewrite him and lose some of my favourite scenes (unlikeable characters are just so much more fun to write, tho!). 

I also struggled to make the husband sympathetic and although he really does come across as quite toxic, by making the protagonist a lot more predatory I evened out the field (I think). Yes, she is a victim, but she’s also calculating and a little toxic herself. In one place she says about her husband’s mistress, “I have a bad feeling about Margot. I wonder if she, like me, understands that Voytek’s weakness is not young women but that he has a blindspot where he can’t see he’s as much of a prey as they are.”

ALU: Did you uncover anything surprising about yourself while writing your book?

JB: I found writing of Monster to be exhilarating. I realized, while writing it, that I was finally feeling confident in my art. It’s not that writing was ever a struggle but with this novel it was almost like flying or something…I understood for the first time what people meant about being “in the flow.” I was in the flow almost the entire time. 

ALU: From your debut novel, Guy, to Monster, how do you think your writing has evolved, or changed? 

JB: See #4 and also, I feel that I’ve been a lot more brave with Monster in that I censored myself a lot less. Not that I censored myself a lot with Guy, but I was always aware of the fact that it was my first novel and that I had to prove myself that I could write about something/someone other than myself. I was known for Drunk Mom and my personal essays, but aside from some short stories I was a newbie when it came to fiction. With Monster, I no longer had to think about those things, although, of course, one always wants their book to be a critical success.

ALU: As a multi-genre writer, do you gravitate more towards one form over another? Do you find it hard to switch between them, or do they inform each other?

JB: I always thought fiction was a lot more challenging since you have to invent so much—I have the utmost respect for fiction writers. But when I wrote a memoir, I realized all the same rules apply: structure, story (plot), voice. I don’t find it hard to switch at all. I am very intimidated by poetry, however, and I’m not sure I can write poems, but I want to try. At the same time, we have enough bad poets around (and some genius ones too—my favourite one is Robin Richardson).

ALU: Are there any books you recently read that you can’t stop thinking about?

JB: I don’t read very fast so I really have to love whatever I’m reading, and for that reason I try to only read books I won’t be able to stop thinking about. And there are certain writers whose future books I can’t wait for—people like Sophie McCreesh, Victoria Hetherington, Cat Black, Russell Smith, Laura Albert, Lena Anderson, Melissa Broder, Herman Koch, Raven Leilani, Bunmi Adeoye, Anna Doran, Zoe Whittall, Tamara Faith Berger, and Alicia Elliot. I could go on and on, but those are the first ones that come to mind. I’m also still very upset over Barbara Gowdy quitting writing. 

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Jowita Bydlowska is the author of four books, Monster being her latest novel (it was named one of the CBC’s Best Fiction Reads of 2024). Her new nonfiction book, Unshaming, on the topic of shame, is coming out in 2026 and she’s currently at work on a new novel, An Animal Within An Animal, a book about perimenopause, sex, and bias in the medical industry. She is a mentor, and a noninfluencer. She lives in Toronto.